What if the way adults handle conflict during divorce could actually reshape a child’s developing brain? In this conversation, we talk with renowned psychologist and AFCC Distinguished Service Award recipient, Mindy Mitnick, about what toxic stress really is — and why every divorcing parent needs to understand it.
Drawing on nearly five decades working with family courts, parenting time and decision making disputes, high-conflict separations, and complex parent–child dynamics, Mindy explains the crucial differences between positive, negative, acute, chronic, and toxic stress. She breaks down how ongoing conflict, fear, and instability can interfere with the development of the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for impulse control, judgment, and problem-solving.
Krista and Mindy also look closely at everyday moments that quietly shape a child’s inner world: how (and whether) parents talk to kids about divorce, what happens when one parent is subtly undermined, and how children end up emotionally caring for a distressed parent.
Most importantly, listeners learn valuable ways to buffer children from harm. By the end, we understand not only what toxic stress does to children, but also how intentional choices by adults can protect kids’ emotional and neurological health, even in very hard seasons of family restructuring.
In this episode, you will hear:
- The difference between positive, negative, acute, chronic, and toxic stress in children
- How toxic stress can affect a child’s brain development and long-term behavior
- Why “we never fight” divorces can still be deeply confusing and painful for kids
- Practical ways parents and professionals can build resilience around children
- How to talk about the other parent without causing hidden harm
Resources from this Episode
www.childrenfirstfamilylaw.com
All states have different laws; be sure you are checking out your state laws specifically surrounding divorce. Krista is a licensed attorney in Colorado and Wyoming but is not providing through this podcast legal advice. Please be sure to seek independent legal counsel in your area for your specific situation.
Follow and Review:
We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple ‘+’ in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.
