No matter how amiable and cooperative the co-parents are after the final court decree issues in a family breakdown, they might find they continue to disagree on major issues in their child’s life. If the co-parents cannot or will not deal with each other – or one parent won’t – this difficulty in decision-making compounds. Sometimes the dysfunctional co-parenting gets so far off the rails that the fighting is worse than when the family was together or families simply get stuck in ways that are terribly detrimental to the child. To resolve situations such as this, Colorado passed legislation to establish parenting coordinators (PCs) and parenting coordinators with decision-making authority (PC/DMs) who are trained to help parents navigate these disagreements and, when necessary, make decisions for them.
At Children First Family Law, we offer PC/DM services that facilitate resolution of disagreements while protecting children from the harmful fallout of conflict. When the relationship between parents is broken, we work to fuse it together into a new base on which to build a stronger family structure for the future, enabling your child to thrive despite the discord.
What is a PC/DM?
Using a PC/DM is considered a form of alternative dispute resolution (ADR). The hope is that, with the help of the PC/DM, the disagreement between the parents can be resolved without having to take the matter back to court and have a judge make the decision.
In the parenting coordinator role, the PC/DM acts as a mediator, directing and facilitating efforts to help parents reach their own agreements. If parents cannot develop mutually satisfactory arrangements with the help of the PC/DM, the DM functions get triggered for the PC/DM to make the decisions in a more formal way, including filing the decisions with the court.
The Association of Family and Conciliation Courts (AFCC) has developed a set of guidelines for parenting coordinators to follow when they are also granted decision-making authority. The goal of this type of ADR is to:
- Help the parents work together to implement a parenting plan;
- Ensure that the elements of the plan are being followed;
- Resolve any conflicts that might arise; and
- Ensure that the child will be able to maintain a meaningful relationship with both parents.
Why Would I Need a PC/DM?
Decision-making authority over the categories of major decisions is established at the time of the divorce, legal separation, or allocation of parental rights. This includes medical and educational decision-making as well as extracurricular activity decision-making. Another category is religious decision-making (though case law has largely altered that as a category in Colorado, giving both parents the ability to expose the child to religion of the parent’s choosing).
The problems arise when the parents disagree about the major decisions that must be made. Examples of such major decisions include medical, dental, and mental health care, what schools or educational tracks a child should attend, whether the child can participate in dangerous or risky sports or other activities, and sometimes can include decisions such as whether children can get tattoos or piercings or change the color of their hair or be able to drive. If the parents cannot reach an agreement by themselves, a PC/DM can help them to reach a decision or make the decision for them after listening and considering parents’ perspectives and positions.
Navigating what happens when there is joint decision-making over a category or all categories and the parents don’t agree is where the PC/DM role enters the picture.
PC Only
A PC can be appointed by the court for a two-year term without parental consent. This is because sometimes the court can tell that the parents will be very unlikely to get along enough to get through the next two years without much conflict. So the court decides that rather than have these parents circling back to court frequently, a PC is required to help the parents navigate conflict better.
PC/DM
A PC/DM cannot be appointed without the consent of the parents. This is because making decisions about your own children is a fundamental right of a parent so cannot just be taken away by a judge and handed to someone else. However, if the parents agree, a PC/DM can be appointed for a two-year term to both help with coordinating decisions and then, when necessary, shifting into a DM role to make the decisions if the parents do not agree.
DM Only
Courts also may appoint a DM only – without the PC component. This firm does not take such appointments. That is because our goal is to work with parents to help them make decisions well and become better coparents, and the DM role alone (without the PC counterpart) is a lot more like just going to a judge. We prefer to build relationships with parents, help them become better communicators with one another, and hopefully not need us in the future. We want them to learn to put children first and work with the co-parent to figure out how to do that well in the new normal of coparenting for the long haul until their children grow up.
Learn More
At Children First Family Law, we understand how stressful divorce and changes in parenting time can be for you and your child. Our goal is to diminish this stress as much as possible and create an atmosphere in which your child can flourish, despite the changes in the family dynamic.
We have extensive PC/DM experience and understand the intricacies, challenges, and nuances of co-parenting and financial issues in families. We can provide a neutral yet decisive PC/DM style that aids in peacemaking and resolution for parents and, most importantly, for their children. We aim to keep the parties out of court as much as possible and keep conflict to a minimum. Let us help your family weather this storm.
For more information: please email us at info@childrenfirstfamilylaw.com.